Saying "No"

Recently, I watched a debate between Todd Friel and Dan Barker--during which, I heard a lot of stuff that was difficult to follow, mostly because Dan Barker was not making a whole plethora of sense. It seemed that his goal was merely to prove that Christians are immoral and that it's wrong for us to have to face consequences for our actions. The debate was supposed to be about whether or not God exists at all, so I have to say that he definitely didn't keep on point very much.

And then I said to myself...I said, "Self, what else shall we do today?" And then I answered myself; and I said, "Self, here's what we'll do...."

And then, I started reading my Bible some more...being as how I'm home sick from work, it seemed to be the most productive way to spend my day. To be honest, I've never actually read it from Genesis to Revelation. I get distracted so easily. I also read from the KJV, which can be difficult to understand at times, but I believe that it is the closest to the truth and it causes me to dig deeper than I would if it were more simply put.

I intend to finish reading it and then to read it again for the rest of my life. I believe that Jesus has more for me than this and that the things which Yahweh is starting now will lead further into His glory. It was actually something that happened at work the other day that awoke this hunger within me.

I was already following Jesus and talking about Him and preaching the Gospel every chance in which I could muster the courage, no matter where I was. I thought that I was doing fine, even though I was not in His Word daily and even though I did not pray very often. It was quite like being in a long distance relationship.

So, then, while in Repack, a group of people and myself were standing around a table, working and talking, when somebody said something...something which I could not recall, but for which the only plausible answer involved Jesus. I can't remember everything, but I think that it started as a joke and somebody said I act all innocent but that how I think about people is cold, or something of that nature. It was a joke, and I took it that way, but I immediately informed them that I was a terrible person in High School and that I did, at one time, think very coldly of people and that someone actually used to call me the "Ice Queen" in school...but that Jesus had changed me.

This, naturally, led into a discussion about Yahweh and Jesus. I was told that I could not judge entire nations of people because they don't follow Jesus. So, I mentioned that I judge and condemn nobody, but that Jesus does that. Somebody said "well, I thought Jesus was supposed to be tolerant". Jesus is far from tolerant. Matthew 7:14 says that the gate is narrow which leads unto life and that there are few which find it. Matthew 7:21-23 says that not everyone who claims to be His will be allowed in. He will say "depart from me, workers of iniquity, for I never knew you." Does that sound tolerant? While I could not recall these Scriptures at the time, I did point out that Jesus was not tolerant and I mentioned that Jesus had overturned tables, chased people with whips, and called people snakes and vipers. Jesus does NOT simply accept everybody. But all who will repent and trust in Jesus, humbling themselves before Him, will be saved. It's about His glory, not about our acceptance.

Anyhow...my supervisor told me then that I had to stop talking about religion at work. He said that it was not showing respect for others for me to talk about religion because somebody could get offended. I told him that, if I believe this as strongly as I do, then it would not be showing respect for others for me not to mention it. (I hadn't even mentioned Hell, just Jesus) So, he told me that, if I continued to mention religion at work and somebody complained to him, then it could negatively impact my review.

Now, respect for others is one of this company's values. If you get a mark against any of the values, you are generally let go without second questions. So, basically, I could get fired for this. But...Jesus wouldn't leave me alone about it. For the next couple of minutes, I felt an intense guilt and pictured the scene in Acts 4, when the Apostles were told to stop preaching Jesus.

And they called them, and commanded them not to speak at all nor teach in the name of Jesus. But Peter and John answered and said unto them, Whether it be right in the sight of God to hearken unto you more than unto God, judge ye. For we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard. (Acts 4:18-20 KJV)

So, I found him later and I told him that, while I understand where he is coming from, I can't agree to this. He told me to try...but, I said that I couldn't simply not talk about it. So, he said "okay" and walked away.

I realized that it would be wrong for me to agree not to talk about Jesus at work. If somebody at work asks me not to mention religion to that particular person, then I will not start up a conversation about it with them. However, it would be sinful, hypocritical, and potentially blasphemous for me to say "okay, I will betray the One who gave me breath, who gave me life, and who sanctifies and saves me from my sins daily so that somebody does not get offended"

And then I realized that I've already been stealing time from Him. How often do I play video games or watch television? Not that these things are bad, but whenever you neglect to even acknowledge Yahweh most of the time because you are doing something else, then you are sinning in what is tantamount to idolatry.

Do I love working where I work? Yes. Do I love the people I work with? Very much. Do I love that I am helping and that I am an asset? More than I can express.

But I love Jesus more.

I am not concerned about my job, or my relationships with other people, or my standing in this world. I know the One who holds tomorrow. I do not fear what may come. I know that Yahweh will be glorified. I know that, one day, every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus is LORD, to the glory of Yahweh. As long as this holds true, let whatever happens happen. Whatever will be will be.

I mention this only for the glory of Yahweh and because I've realized that, in choosing pleasure above Jesus, I have sinned. I have chosen my friends, my career, my games, my books, and myself over the One who blessed me with all of that in the first place.

So...I no longer intend to do so. I need witnesses in order to make this more binding whenever I say that I will gladly lay down all that I hold dear in order to follow Jesus, if that is what He asks of me. And I will start by choosing to be with Him before I choose to watch television, read, write, and before I play Skyrim or Dragons of Atlantis.