Saying "No"

Recently, I watched a debate between Todd Friel and Dan Barker--during which, I heard a lot of stuff that was difficult to follow, mostly because Dan Barker was not making a whole plethora of sense. It seemed that his goal was merely to prove that Christians are immoral and that it's wrong for us to have to face consequences for our actions. The debate was supposed to be about whether or not God exists at all, so I have to say that he definitely didn't keep on point very much.

And then I said to myself...I said, "Self, what else shall we do today?" And then I answered myself; and I said, "Self, here's what we'll do...."

And then, I started reading my Bible some more...being as how I'm home sick from work, it seemed to be the most productive way to spend my day. To be honest, I've never actually read it from Genesis to Revelation. I get distracted so easily. I also read from the KJV, which can be difficult to understand at times, but I believe that it is the closest to the truth and it causes me to dig deeper than I would if it were more simply put.

I intend to finish reading it and then to read it again for the rest of my life. I believe that Jesus has more for me than this and that the things which Yahweh is starting now will lead further into His glory. It was actually something that happened at work the other day that awoke this hunger within me.

I was already following Jesus and talking about Him and preaching the Gospel every chance in which I could muster the courage, no matter where I was. I thought that I was doing fine, even though I was not in His Word daily and even though I did not pray very often. It was quite like being in a long distance relationship.

So, then, while in Repack, a group of people and myself were standing around a table, working and talking, when somebody said something...something which I could not recall, but for which the only plausible answer involved Jesus. I can't remember everything, but I think that it started as a joke and somebody said I act all innocent but that how I think about people is cold, or something of that nature. It was a joke, and I took it that way, but I immediately informed them that I was a terrible person in High School and that I did, at one time, think very coldly of people and that someone actually used to call me the "Ice Queen" in school...but that Jesus had changed me.

This, naturally, led into a discussion about Yahweh and Jesus. I was told that I could not judge entire nations of people because they don't follow Jesus. So, I mentioned that I judge and condemn nobody, but that Jesus does that. Somebody said "well, I thought Jesus was supposed to be tolerant". Jesus is far from tolerant. Matthew 7:14 says that the gate is narrow which leads unto life and that there are few which find it. Matthew 7:21-23 says that not everyone who claims to be His will be allowed in. He will say "depart from me, workers of iniquity, for I never knew you." Does that sound tolerant? While I could not recall these Scriptures at the time, I did point out that Jesus was not tolerant and I mentioned that Jesus had overturned tables, chased people with whips, and called people snakes and vipers. Jesus does NOT simply accept everybody. But all who will repent and trust in Jesus, humbling themselves before Him, will be saved. It's about His glory, not about our acceptance.

Anyhow...my supervisor told me then that I had to stop talking about religion at work. He said that it was not showing respect for others for me to talk about religion because somebody could get offended. I told him that, if I believe this as strongly as I do, then it would not be showing respect for others for me not to mention it. (I hadn't even mentioned Hell, just Jesus) So, he told me that, if I continued to mention religion at work and somebody complained to him, then it could negatively impact my review.

Now, respect for others is one of this company's values. If you get a mark against any of the values, you are generally let go without second questions. So, basically, I could get fired for this. But...Jesus wouldn't leave me alone about it. For the next couple of minutes, I felt an intense guilt and pictured the scene in Acts 4, when the Apostles were told to stop preaching Jesus.

And they called them, and commanded them not to speak at all nor teach in the name of Jesus. But Peter and John answered and said unto them, Whether it be right in the sight of God to hearken unto you more than unto God, judge ye. For we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard. (Acts 4:18-20 KJV)

So, I found him later and I told him that, while I understand where he is coming from, I can't agree to this. He told me to try...but, I said that I couldn't simply not talk about it. So, he said "okay" and walked away.

I realized that it would be wrong for me to agree not to talk about Jesus at work. If somebody at work asks me not to mention religion to that particular person, then I will not start up a conversation about it with them. However, it would be sinful, hypocritical, and potentially blasphemous for me to say "okay, I will betray the One who gave me breath, who gave me life, and who sanctifies and saves me from my sins daily so that somebody does not get offended"

And then I realized that I've already been stealing time from Him. How often do I play video games or watch television? Not that these things are bad, but whenever you neglect to even acknowledge Yahweh most of the time because you are doing something else, then you are sinning in what is tantamount to idolatry.

Do I love working where I work? Yes. Do I love the people I work with? Very much. Do I love that I am helping and that I am an asset? More than I can express.

But I love Jesus more.

I am not concerned about my job, or my relationships with other people, or my standing in this world. I know the One who holds tomorrow. I do not fear what may come. I know that Yahweh will be glorified. I know that, one day, every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus is LORD, to the glory of Yahweh. As long as this holds true, let whatever happens happen. Whatever will be will be.

I mention this only for the glory of Yahweh and because I've realized that, in choosing pleasure above Jesus, I have sinned. I have chosen my friends, my career, my games, my books, and myself over the One who blessed me with all of that in the first place.

So...I no longer intend to do so. I need witnesses in order to make this more binding whenever I say that I will gladly lay down all that I hold dear in order to follow Jesus, if that is what He asks of me. And I will start by choosing to be with Him before I choose to watch television, read, write, and before I play Skyrim or Dragons of Atlantis.

Following Christ

Through each day that goes by, it will become harder to be a follower of Christ. Many of us in the West have no idea what that means. We go through our day, never talking about Jesus, much less thinking about Him. After all, religion is one of those things we are taught to never talk about. We call ourselves 'Christian' because--at one time or another, perhaps in the high of a Bible camp--we walked down an aisle or raised a hand and a kindly person led us through a prayer which is pretty much the same for all of us. "Dear Jesus, I know that I am a sinner. I am sorry for my sins. I believe that You died on the cross for my sins. Please come into my heart. Thank you. Amen."

But what does it actually mean to be a Christian? Can it truly be so simple that all you have to do is say a little prayer, be baptized, and you're in? Do we walk away from our conversion experience believing anything other than that we've just been given free fire insurance?

To be a Christian is to follow Jesus. According to Scripture, following Jesus is more than simply saying a prayer and being dunked under water. It is more than simply a one-time experience.

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Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. (Matthew 16:24-25 KJV)

If ye love me, keep my commandments. And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever; even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you. I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you. Yet a little while and the world seeth me no more; but ye see me: because I live, ye shall live also. At the day ye shall know that I am in my Father, and ye in me, and I in you. He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him. (John 14:15-21 KJV)

He that saith he abideth in him ought himself also so to walk, even as he walked. (I John 2:6 KJV)

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. (Romans 12:1-2 KJV)

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:29-32 KJV)

Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children; and walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour. But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints; neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting, which are not convenient: but rather giving of thanks. For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no man deceive you with vain words: for because of these things cometh the wrath of God upon the children of disobedience. Be not ye therefore partakers with them. For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord: walk as children of light: (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth;) proving what is acceptable unto the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them. For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret. But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light. Wherefore he saith, Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light. See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is. And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. (Ephesians 5:1-21 KJV)

This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would. But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, envyings murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another. (Galatians 5:16-26 KJV)

And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth. Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen. (Matthew 28:18-20 KJV)

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There are many Scriptures which express the truth that those who follow Christ are meant to live as He lived and--if need be--to die as He died. To be a Christian is to follow Christ. To follow Christ is to live by the Holy Spirit, finding nourishment in the Bible as the word of the Most High. We are to lay aside those selfish desires and take up the mantle of Jesus.

Repent and believe on Jesus Christ!

Pray more than just whenever you need something from Him, are going to bed, or are fixing to eat supper.  Pray more than just at church. Spend time in the Scriptures each day. Be with your God throughout your day. Instead of allowing your mind to worry throughout the day, focus on Jesus Christ--on Yahweh--on Light, Truth, Grace, and Purity. Think on the Scriptures and on hymns.

Be cautious of what you allow into your mind and your heart. Guard your heart, your mind, your soul, lest Satan gain a foothold in your life.

Be wary of how you speak and act around those around you. From the moment you first called yourself a Christian, you were an Ambassador of Christ...a representative...if we are the Body of Christ, then the world sees Him whenever they look at you....and if they aren't--even if they think that they are--then they need to. Don't be afraid to speak of what He has done for you throughout your day. Do not allow your faith to sit still, for stagnant water will grow stale and will become a swamp.

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As the world chases the gods of tolerance, wealth, sex, and pleasure, it will grow more and more difficult to follow Christ. You see, those who follow Christ will always be seen as intolerant and judgmental. To love another person--to love a sinner--is not to ignore their sin; but, rather, it is to show them that they are acting against a holy and just God. If we--as Christians--are told to love one another and yet we do not, then we are sinning. If we do not pull the log out of the eye of another in an area in which our eyes are clear, then we are not loving. If you do not confront it for fear of being condemned, rejected, or being called judgmental, then you, too, are sinning.

Do not be afraid to speak up. Do not fear man...what they say...what they do....rather, fear the living God, honour Him, love Him, and do not deny Him.

In any case--as I like to say--being blind and denying that 18-wheelers exist as you stand in the center of a highway will not keep you from being hit by one, simply because you are blind and do not think such a thing could be true.

Love everyone, but love Yahweh first....after all...He IS Lord.

Western Christianity ~vs~ Eastern Christianity

Western Christianity is different from Eastern Christianity.

Why?

Many of us in the West don't know persecution and so we have a lot of tares in among the wheat because there is little to weed them out. Our roots don't dig very deep because we are spoiled. Many of those in the East can scarcely be tares because there is so much persecution that it weeds them out. Eastern Christians meet whenever... they can and spread the Word whenever they can get away with it. Western Christians meet once a week...twice, if they're feeling "religious"...Western Christians will rarely go out and tell somebody about the Word unless if they are directly asked...and for them, half an hour a week is more than enough time to spend with One they claim to love so much...and at the first sign of persecution, our knees buckle and we cry out to God, asking why He would dare allow our comfort to be temporarily disturbed...

Western Christianity--for the most part--is spoiled, too comfortable, and too lukewarm.

So, Christian, I challenge you...

I challenge you to dare to be persecuted.

I challenge you to upset your routine.

I challenge you to be as excited about Jesus as the Apostles were.

I challenge you to spread the Word at all costs.

I challenge you to risk losing "friends".

I challenge you to meet with Christians outside of your Sunday worship services and discuss Christ throughout the week...perhaps even starting a home-group.

I challenge you to allow Christ to be more precious to you than anything life can give or death can take. (Christ will be glorified in you whenever He is more precious to you than anything life can give or death can take.__John Piper.

I challenge you to make Jesus your everything.

I challenge you to put Yahweh first in all things.

I challenge you to not just read your Bible, but to study it and let it truly be your spiritual food...to live by what's written in there rather than living by your own desires and lusts.

I challenge you to prove that there is no "Western Christianity" or "Eastern Christianity"...there is only Jesus and the Bride of Christ.

I challenge you to cast off the status quo, take up your cross, and follow Him in all things...wherever He leads, may you follow always.

I challenge you to turn from the ways of this world, turn to Jesus, and be on fire for Him.

Duck Dynasty

I find it interesting that everybody is going off the handle about this whole "Duck Dynasty" fiasco. What I've noticed is that most people are just reading what other people are saying Phil said and are taking things out of context. Personally, after having studied the GQ article rather intently, I believe that a lot of what Phil has said has been misunderstood. If we had all looked at this from an unbiased viewpoint, I believe that there would have been a little bit less drama. Rather than acting like schoolchildren, we should dissect what was said.

For instance, I forgot about the fact that I disagree with homosexuality and looked at the comments from the outside. I have several friends who are homosexual, so it's not that I'm hating them in saying that I disagree with it. I just don't feel that it's Biblical, but you won't see me condemning or attacking anybody for homosexuality any more than I would for seeing a child taking something from a store without paying. I would offer my thoughts, if asked, but would not attack or put down...which is, I believe, what Phil was doing. He was simply offering his view and quoting Scriptures that supported his view.

What he was saying, also, was not that bestiality was the same as homosexuality. He was listing off sexual sins and just happened to place the two next to each other. It was a list, though, and not saying that they were the same thing. Phil knows that they are not the same thing. He is the elder of a church, 67 years old, and has quite a testimony. And I did look very hard at the things he said because I am all for love and grace and I wanted very desperately to see if he was wrong because I kind of look up to the guy and respect him a lot.

After this, I took a look at the civil rights comments. This one was a little bit tough for me to swallow and I thought, at this point, that maybe I should give up and maybe some people were right...but then I realized that that wasn't what he was saying, either. He wasn't saying that every single black was happy before civil rights. He was saying that he had never seen them treated harshly. And back whenever blacks were treated so harshly, some of them were actually treated fairly well...not many, true, but some, so maybe he knew some who were treated well. And after some thought, I realized that he was saying that the ones he knew were happy because they had Jesus. He was saying that, even through it all, having Jesus kept their joy. It didn't matter in the grand scheme of things...he wasn't saying that it wasn't wrong and neither am I. He's saying that the ones he knew still had some joy because they still had Jesus...of course they would be singing. They had Jesus. Christians all across the world who are imprisoned and tortured still sing sometimes...because even their situations cannot take their joy from them and they know it.

Now about marrying fifteen year old girls...there's nothing wrong with marrying somebody who is fifteen. People did it all of the time for thousands of years without a problem. If you are in love with her, she is in love with you, you speak with the parents, and the parents approve, then there is nothing wrong with it. It becomes wrong whenever the person is younger than fourteen. There are some families, even here in America, who will allow their teenager to get married at so young an age as fifteen. As long as things are kept above board and the parents are in agreement, then it should be fine.

Phil Robertson, I've deduced from several interviews, doesn't want to hurt anybody and he didn't mean for his words to be taken so wrongly. But Scripturally, he is on track...he was not calling anybody names and he did not say anything hateful. He merely offered his opinion, some people disagreed, some people were too sensitive to it, and some people overreacted.

We have to be very careful about persecuting a person for speaking their opinions. If we turn this nation into one where people will be afraid to speak their minds and their hearts, then we will turn this nation into one in which--soon--nobody has a choice in anything and nobody has a voice in anything.

I stand with the Founding Fathers in this: If you take away somebody's voice, you will take away your own.

The Wrath of God

Something which many people fail to address any more is the wrath of God. The only people who seem to want to teach on that are the wackadoodles like the Westboro Baptist Church, who are on the far too extreme side of things or the ones who say “there is no longer wrath” or the increasingly fewer ones who actually preach it rightly…that Yahweh, the God of Israel, is loving, just, kind, merciful, slow to anger, good—but also wrathful.

  

For people to say that God hates everybody except for them is wrong…for God so loved THE WORLD that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him should not perish but have everlasting life(John 3:16). For people to say that God wants certain people to go to Hell is also wrong. For, as Scripture tells us in II Peter 3:8, Yahweh is “not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.”

  

For people to say that there is no longer wrath is perhaps the most dangerous of the doctrines concerning the wrath of God, for it removes all consequence of sin. If there is no wrath, why preach the Gospels? Why attempt to reach anybody? Let us all eat, drink, and be merry, for nothing will ever come of our evil.

  

In order to say that there is no longer wrath, one would have to reason within themselves that the God of the Old Testament is not the same God of the New Testament…that, somehow over the course of time, Yahweh changed. (I hear that having children can do that to a person). One would have to reason that, whenever God says that He never changes and is always the same(Malachi 3:6, Hebrews 13:8)he didn’t mean it.

  

I have come across several teachers who teach that, sometime between the Old and the New Testaments, God changed. Yet, this is in complete contradiction to Scripture. If Scripture says that God does not change and yet He does change, then Scripture is false, and what ground is there for your faith? If you do not believe every word of Scripture to be true, then how can a person say that anything in Scripture is true? How can any person, by that presumption, claim that Jesus Christ died on the cross and was risen from the dead to save man from his sins? If there is no longer wrath, why would Jesus have needed to die on the cross anyhow? Therefore, one must claim that part of Scripture—and as a result, all of Scripture—is false, in order to claim that there is no more wrath. And in order to claim that Scripture is false, one must claim that their faith is a sham. And if one’s faith is a sham, why listen to their teachings on faith?

  

Can one claim that all of humanity is now saved and that, somehow, the death and resurrection of Jesus turned the wrath of Yahweh from off of all of humanity?

 On the night of the Passover, in Ancient Egypt, the Jews covered their doors in the blood of lambs. Doing this did not spare the Egyptians. It spared the Jews because the Jews were the ones who trusted that, through the blood of a lamb, God would keep them safe.

  

Yahweh is a holy God. He cannot look upon sin. This is not to say that He does not see it, but that He is so incredibly holy that He simply cannot be around it. This is why, for just a few moments on the cross, Yahweh turned His face from Jesus. For, in that moment, the sins of the world weighed upon the shoulders of the One on the cross.

 In order to understand that the wrath of God must still be around, one must understand just what sin is. Yahweh created the universe and all that is in it. By all rights, it is His. We are just given permission to steward it, but we are to glorify Him in it. To sin is to act against the will of God. To act against the will of God is to rebel against the Creator. To rebel against the Creator—the King—is to claim subservience to the enemy. Even we, as humans, understand that this is base treachery and that, if you were to stop fighting for your nation and fight for another nation, you would be killed. Yet, in society, nobody has any problem with traitors of a nation being executed. It is only whenever we betray our King that we believe punishment to be unjust.

 If sinning is acting in direct opposition to the will of God and acting against the will of God is also rebelling against the King, then sinning is rebelling against the King. For a person to say that rebelling against a King will have no consequences is like saying that pulling the pin out of a grenade and then putting the pin back in will somehow keep the grenade from detonating. You’ve pulled out the pin, tripping the spring and igniting the spark. If you put that pin back in, the grenade is still going to explode because the spring is already tripped. In the same way, if you rebel against God and then say “nothing will come of this”, chances are that that won’t keep something from coming of it. You’ve offended a Holy God and I guarantee you that He has the power and the right to strike back harder and faster.

  

There are only two sides in the war of good and evil. There is no Switzerland. If you are not for God, then you are against Him. If you are against Him, then you are for the enemy. If you are for the enemy, then you are under the wrath of God. From the moment in which you are able to understand right from wrong, you are liable for whatever sins you commit. Therefore, no person is exempt from the wrath of God on their own, for the wrath of God is against all unrighteousness. To sin is to be unrighteous. Therefore, if you are a sinner, then you are unrighteous. If you are unrighteous, then you are under the wrath of God.

 This is why Jesus came.

 In Ancient Egypt, the Jews had to take the blood of a lamb and put it over their doors in order that the wrath of God—in the form of the angel of death—would pass over their homes. This was the final plague against Egypt and it would be what finally convinced the Pharaoh to free the Israelites from slavery.

  

Throughout Scripture, we hear of Jesus being called the “Lamb of God”. This is because, whenever we are covered in His blood, the wrath of God passes over us. He was beaten for our sins and bruised for our iniquity. He took upon Himself the punishment that rightly belonged to us. By His wounds, we are healed…by His blood, our sins are hid. They are no more.

 You have been alone in a cell, beating your head against the wall. The shackles around your ankles keep you restricted to one small section of the cell…imprisoned even from being able to move around your prison. And whenever you accept Jesus as your Saviour, He comes and breaks the shackles. He opens the cell and says “follow me.”

  

What do you do?

  

Do you follow Him? Or do you take one step outside of your cell and then step back in? It would seem easier and far less risky to stay. Even though you can see the form of Jesus ahead of you, the corridors are dark and smelly. The air is damp and full of mold. At least now, you are free to leave whenever you want to, because you accepted Jesus as your Saviour. You said the prayer…you may even have been baptized…but, right now, what is familiar to you seems better than leaving and walking down that dark hallway. Who knows what you might meet? No, perhaps it’s better to stay behind…you’ll leave if you need to, now that you can, but it’s just so much more comfortable…

 What you did not know and He did know is that, at the end of the hall, there are steps leading out of the dungeon. And once out of the dungeon, all you would’ve had to do is to follow Jesus until you were out of Satan’s kingdom and into the Kingdom of God.

  

And after that?

 Sure, you still would have needed to follow Jesus, but you would be in the Kingdom of God…there would be no more tears, no more sorrow, no more pain, no more darkness…it would’ve been easy once you got away from the enemy’s kingdom and were free of his allies.

  

And all it would’ve taken was to step out of that cell…but because you stayed, you kept sin and Satan as your master, rejecting Jesus Christ as your rightful King. Therefore, whenever the King would be ready to lead the Army of the Lord against the kingdom of unrighteousness, you would be beneath its palace in the dungeons…and whenever the castle of Hell is brought down upon you, who can you blame? Because Jesus had offered you an out…and you didn’t take it…

 The wrath of God is poured out against all unrighteousness…and he that believes on Jesus has everlasting life: and he that does not believe on Jesus shall not see life, but the wrath of God is on him…therefore, choose ye this day whom you will serve…as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.

Acrobatic Gallant

I was supposed to be filling in at the church for the youth minister, who would be away on this day. Being a bit of a procrastinator and having a lot on my mind-what with being engaged recently and having a bit of a disparage with my fiance during the week and my mom's temporary visit to the hospital-it was Saturday before I started digging for something to teach. I had thought some through the week, but nothing stood out to me. And then I remembered my outlook on purity and how firm I am in my stance on that and I decided to teach on that for this Sunday. So, I stayed up until around Midnight, making sure that I had everything I would need and the proper Scriptures. I then got ready for bed and read my Bible. I prayed that night, asking God for His will to be done in this lesson and telling Him that I had no idea what I was going to do, seeing as how this was only the second time I had ever taught a class on anything and the first time, I had to bribe them with some koolaids and some gummi snacks so that they would behave. I was nervous and I'm not too good at speaking in front of people, so who knew what would come of it...? But I needn't have worried, because He didn't want me there, anyhow.

I had to wake up at 7:00 the next morning in order to be ready for church by 9:00. (It's about a 45 minute drive or so). I texted my fiance and asked if he could drive me because I was too tired to drive and knew that it wouldn't be a good idea for me to drive being that tired. It had been after Midnight before I managed to fall asleep, having recently begun suffering from the occasional insomnia. There was no answer because, for the first time, he overslept and my text didn't wake him up. Usually, my texts will wake him up, but it didn't do so this time.

So-admittedly, a little annoyed that I'd have to drive being that tired-I got into my car and started for church. I reached a town between my city and church and stopped for some donuts. I'd bribe this class too, see, and then they might not be too chaotic.  Now, from this town to my church, it's about 20 minutes. As I got back into my car, I realized that it was 8:40 or so. I needed to be at the church before 9:00. So, a little panicky, I did a very stupid thing and decided to drive 5 miles above the speedlimit.

If you are familiar with Missouri roads, you'll know that this is never a smart thing to do in the country. But, I'm usually a decent driver and had never had a car accident before, so I thought "you can handle it". Bad idea. For one: I was breaking the law, which is wrong in and of itself. For another thing: It was sinning against God to break a government law that was not anti-Christian. And for another thing: It was dangerous. I shouldn't have done it and I won't do it any more.

Having not eaten this morning, due to the fact that I was in a hurry and had stupidly already brushed my teeth, I had a chunk of zucchini bread sitting in the passenger seat. I went around a curve and heard something slide across my seat. I looked at the seat to make sure that the bread had not fallen, which took all of one second. Whenever I looked back up, I had begun to go into the other lane. I quickly pulled back into my lane, which resulted in my back wheels going into a slide. A curve was coming up at the end of the straight, so I knew I needed to get control of my car soon, so I fought for control of it, knowing that you're supposed to turn into the skid, but it didn't work and it begun to swerve all over the road. The curve was getting closer and I was tired and so, not thinking in my exhaustion, I hit my brake.

My car didn't listen too well and it went off the road towards a fence, on the other side of which was a large hill with a pond at the bottom. I knew that this was a horse ranch, and accepting the fact that I was going to pay for my stupidity, I closed my eyes. My car hit the ditch head on, which flipped it in its momentum, carrying my car over the fence. I threw my arms up over my head, feeling the car flipping and having no idea how many times it was flipping, but not wishing for my head to hit the steering wheel or the window or anything.

This was it and I knew it and I had accepted the fact that I would probably not survive this. I have Jesus, so I know where I would be going, anyhow. Fear was definitely not an emotion I was feeling...which is odd, seeing as how I tend to be a bit of a coward in the small things.

My car landed and I felt it finish moving and I opened my eyes.

The first thing that I remember thinking was that my airbags had not deployed.

After that, I remember wondering where my cellphone was and trying to open the door. I had to get out of the car. It's never a good idea to hang upside down inside of a wrecked car in somebody's horse pasture. My door wouldn't open, though, but I didn't unfasten my seatbelt yet. Even though you shouldn't hang upside down for too long, I knew that-if I unfastened my seatbelt-it would be more difficult to see around my car and to figure out how to get out of my car.

After that, I thought of the window. So, I pushed the button, though it was far too dark to be sure of which of the four buttons I was pushing. I heard the inner mechanisms working, but it sounded too strange and the window wasn't moving. Then I thought of the sunroof. (Oh, wait, I'm upside down) And then I looked down at my finger that was still pushing the button and I wondered if I was pushing the right button. So, I felt around and pushed another one. I had been accidentally pushing the passenger window (which I later learned had been busted out completely)

Unfastening my seatbelt, I crawled out of the driver window and stood up. Some farmhands were nearby, asking if I was okay, but I needed my cellphone. I assured them that I was okay and got down to look inside of my car to find my cellphone. I called my fiance to let him know and to ask him to call the pastor to let him know that someone else would need to take the class. Afterwards, I called the police.

While I waited for the police and my fiance to show up, the farmhands stayed with me and I began to consider the situation. I was unharmed. I felt no pain and I wasn't bleeding or bruised anywhere. I was shaken up and my car was upside down and the horses seemed confused, but I was okay.

I should have died in that accident. My car didn't just roll over. It did somersaults. It was resting with the trunk on the fence and the fence was on the ground. Between the fence and the road, there were three trees, none of which were broken. Way up the road-I don't know how to describe it in distance, but it was a good ways-there were marks in the grass where my car had run off the road. I had no idea how my car got to where it did or how I survived however my car decided to get there.

The police arrived soon and then my fiance arrived. I answered a lot of questions and even admitted that I had been driving 60mph in a 55mph zone. The police officer didn't say anything about that and he decided to overlook it.

After a while, a tow-truck came and turned my car back over. I was shocked at what I saw. The windshield was shattered, but still in place. The driver's side was unharmed, other than the axles being a little bit broke. The glass on the sunroof didn't even crack. The driver mirror was hanging off, but the passenger mirror was gone. The passenger side of the roof was caved in and the window was busted out. But the driver's side appeared to be fine. Looking at my car on all four wheels, I knew for certain that I should not have walked away from that crash unscathed. Something on me should be broken, but I didn't feel hurt at all and I wasn't bleeding or anything. I did still feel tired, though, but I felt mostly calm. I was shaken, but calm. Does that make sense? I'm not sure I understand too much, but I didn't feel afraid...I couldn't stop shaking, but I didn't feel scared at all.

God wanted me in that car. There's no other explanation for it. My fiance very rarely oversleeps, but whenever he does, my texts always wake him up. He never sleeps through a text from me...I don't believe he ever had until that day...they usually wake him up. But God wanted me in that car so that, whenever it was totaled, I could walk away from it unscathed and Yahweh be glorified.

Yesterday, whenever I woke up, my neck hurt whenever I turned it and my legs were hurting and I ached in more places than I knew I had. Today, whenever I woke up, my neck just feels like I slept on it wrong and no other part of me seems to hurt unless if you apply pressure to it.

A little bit of pain is to be expected...and I will endure whatever comes because I know that I have Jesus and I can make it all be for Him...

But this was God. He kept me from being killed or even very seriously injured in that car accident. Glory be to God always and forever. Amen.